"Loving to Survive" Graham (via kingcobracommander)
and its interesting that when watching tv or reading things the “man cave” always gets brought up as a half joke but really more serious thing that every man “needs” but then when women have craft rooms or other similar things related to their own interest it is always the butt of a joke (haha silly wimminz wanting space of their own)
We’re looking for our next house right now and we are looking for one with enough space that I can have a craft room. That’s non negotiable, I craft a lot and it’s good for my mental health but mostly it’s important to me and therefore it’s important to my boyfriend too.
When I tell people that there is a LOT of pushback. They act like we are being extravagant (I’m aware we are very privileged to be able to afford this but this is fro. People with three cars and five tvs) or say thing like ‘where will [boyfriend] go?!’
Oh I dunno, LITERALLY ANYWHERE ELSE IN THE WHOLE HOUSE, which is also his? Where will he watch tv? Probably the lounge room. You know. Where the tv is.
Or they say ‘will he at least get a shed??’ No, since he hates gardening. Probably I will get a shed.
It makes me so mad, but I hadn’t really articulated why until this post.
This is why the thought of marriage or living with a romantic partner makes me queasy. I NEED my space. I’m not being selfish or cold, I really, honestly need a private place of my own in order to be happy. I’m afraid that if I get married or move in with a partner (specifically a male partner) that I’ll have to give up my private space and I’ll end up making my partner miserable with my own unhappiness. I’m sure LOTS of other women feel this way. Why is it considered so weird and selfish for a woman to want a place of her own? Why can men have “man caves” and garages and workshops to get away from UGH ALL MY WIFE’S STUFF UGH but women are obligated to share all their space with their male partners and children? It’s not fair and it makes me SO MAD.